I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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