At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
