his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Randomize
