Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
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