he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
