The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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