So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
