Sry I called you an 8
And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
