Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
