Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
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