I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
