Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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