I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
