how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
COCAINE IS GR8
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
Randomize
