My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
