The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
