I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
