im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
