Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
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