If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Randomize