You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
