So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
