I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Randomize