tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize
