I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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