She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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