I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Randomize
