I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
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