you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
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