You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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