I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
