I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
