Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
