Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
well you can't waste a boner
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
This is the prime rib incident all over again
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
