i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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