you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
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