shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
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