school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
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