operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize