be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
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