Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
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