HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
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