i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
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