In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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