he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Randomize
