my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
