They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
