i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
