I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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