so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
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What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
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We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
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