I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize